She Knows What You're Re-Gifting

A pal sent this along to me yesterday and I've probably tried it a hundred times. I'm posting this in the spirit of sharing one's new-found addictions--in this case, attempting to trip up a computer (or something) with far superior skills than me. The only time I seem to beat this I realize I'm looking at the original number and not the resulting number after the math. So I look at the resulting number and damn...

How is this done?! Please. Somebody tell me how this works. I know I'll feel stupid, but what's new...


Wisdom From A Civil Servant

"Well you see, Norm, it's like this . . . A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo; and when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Now, as we know, excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. And that, Norm, is why you always feel smarter after a few beers."


Tush Hieroglyphics (Send Yours In)

(_ ^_)
sore ass

swishy ass

kiss my ass

leave my ass alone

tired ass

smart ass

money coming out of his ass

dumb ass

ass hole

tight ass

ass wipe

(_ =:^0 _)
ass face

)_ ? _(
bass ackwards

bad ass

hairy ass

( __(!)__)
big ass

ass hole buddy

(_"kick o-->"_)
kick ass

( ___=O=___ )
lard ass

great ass
perfect ass

lazy ass

( __!O?__)
^ >
^ >
^ >
jump your ass

smack your ass

shove it up your ass

(_mia =o= culpa_)
sorry ass